Have you ever had a deadline on a recording, but felt totally uninspired? I think this is a well-written song, and the publisher expressed confidence she could get it placed with a well done full production… not the demo she had heard. I wanted to pass it off to someone else to worry over, but my co-writers, neither of them musically inclined, insisted I could do it. What I have now is a better quality demo than I had to begin with, but in my opinion anyway, it is still very much lacking. I had to get it out last night, so this is the mp3 of what I had accomplished up till then. I am disgusted.
Well that was a great pitch Kevin
It sounds great - I think it’s a good demo.
If’n it were me I would have put another verse up front to set-up why the guy is lookin’ for the planet with a tongue in check (is he serious?) line. Of course I have no idea what that would be but I just think it needs a stronger setup into the chorus. On the music side I would mute the background pad and just let the vocal and lyric have all the attention, being a song demo.
That’s my take.
as soon as i heard the chorus, i immediately heard (in my head) a classical guitar doing an ascending run on that last 7th chord in the chorus. adds a little flair.
Just got word back from the publisher… it’s still being considered for the project… has to listen to it a few more times.
It IS well written Kevin. Nice feel, with some tweaking could be very good. I’m hearing an acoustic guitar strumming out the chords on this and maybe some nice early Santana percussion. Don’t be disgusted, you’re onto something good.
I like it.