http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20027027/
Why are the police allowed to interfere with religious practices in this way? I thought religious freedom was part of the American constitution?
This child, still being possessed by demons, will now probably grow up to be a drug dealer or a murderer. The police have done themselves no favours by interrupting the ritual.
Demonic possession of young children is very common, and often the exorcism can appear violent to an outsider. But it is necessary, and the alternative is much much worse.
I myself always carry an electric cattle prod and use it to stun any young children I meet. It may not always expel any demons, but it certainly gives me a great feeling of personal satisfaction.
May I borrow your electric cattleprod? I need it for when I’m riding the train and the mothers get on with the little kids and let them stand in the seat with their dirty shoes and eat nowlaters with their fingers and then they want to rub your nice work clothes with their syrup/slobber fingers. Then the train jolts and because they’re standing in the seat they come crashing down on top of you and crush the delicate whatever you’re carrying; then proceed to scream as if you’ve pinched them… yeah I need that cattleprod…for their MOTHERS!
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Why are the police allowed to interfere with religious practices in this way? I thought religious freedom was part of the American constitution?
Not when it involves strangling a minor.
You not serious about this post are you?
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Demonic possession of young children is very common
Bull!
I’d say this guy death was quite karmic considering the circumstances. Maybe the police sapped the devil out of him
Mr Soul, one is not “strangling a minor”, one is expelling a demon.
Many of the actions that a surgeon takes during an operation could be construed as acts of assault, were it not for the fact that the ultimate aim is to help the patient.
And so it is with exorcism.
As for your “Bull” comment, have you actually yourself performed a survey?
I have; and it is my conclusion that virtually all young children are possessed by whole hosts of demons.
I have at present living with me a two year old, and I have exhausted the Goetia in trying to list every demon that lives within him.
His father tries exorcism by tanning the lard out of him, his mother just sits in a corner and weeps tears of futility, but none of these, not even my cattle prod, seem to have any affect whatsoever.
My proposal of ‘burning at the stake’ is being considered at present by his parents, so I’ll let you know how that goes.
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Mr Soul, one is not “strangling a minor”, one is expelling a demon.
I say Bull - again! One man’s exorcism is another man’s assault.
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Many of the actions that a surgeon takes during an operation could be construed as acts of assault, were it not for the fact that the ultimate aim is to help the patient.
Poppy-cock!
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As for your “Bull” comment, have you actually yourself performed a survey?
I have 2 kids & I distinctly remember when I was kid, plus I remember all my friends. Not one of them had any demons in them.
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I have; and it is my conclusion that virtually all young children are possessed by whole hosts of demons.
And your conclusions are based on superstitution & who knows what else. The only fault I can find with children is that they are immature & haven’t learned right from wrong yet. But as for demons - too bull!
Mr Soul, I can only offer to send the child, and his family, to live with you, then you can make up your own mind about the reality of demonic possession.
If they weren’t living with me they would be homeless, so I’m sure they would be happy to move in with you. (Note, they are no relation to me, rather they are the get of the woman with whom I live at present).
The father is 30, and a bum. He’s never worked in his life, nor does he appear to have any desire ever to do so.
The mother is a nice enough girl, but her IQ can be enumerated on the fingers of one hand, and if ‘cleanliness is next to godliness’ then she is Lucifer’s handmaiden.
The oldest child has just turned 6, and it appears that she may one day become a decent human being, but she has her moments…boy, does she have her moments!
The next is almost 4, and she is borderline. She may well be like her older sister and join the ranks of humanity, but I personally don’t think it’s worth taking the chance and still advocate drowning her.
The third, the demon child, is called Jason, but everyone, including his father, calls him Satan.
The fourth is a bare few months old, and therefore still an unknown, but judging by the reeks that emanate from his diaper, I suspect that he has been touched by Beelzebub at least. But as I said, he is still an unknown, so for safety’s sake I still zap him every time I see him. It may not do any good but at least it keeps him quiet for an hour or so. (The side effect that he instantly also fills his diaper is his mother’s problem).
So Mr Soul, that’s them. If you post your home address I’ll send them on the first flight with my blessings, and then perhaps you’ll be better informed about living with demons. 
Eyup!
Ah, Demons, yes.
Well, in the UK we are much more enlightened.
Not having religious freedoms means we can tackle the problem in a robust manner straight away.
However, we seem to be a little lax lately as there have not been any burnings for quite a while now, in fact I can’t remember the last time I attended one (I always forget to take some potatoes and marshmallows with me)
I can confirm though that all children are indeed posessed of Demons at various stages of their lives, girls in particular are seriously afflicted around the age of fourteen.
The cattle prod technique is of little use at this sad time, although the Demon seems to be able to be charmed into brief submission by copius offerings of money.
Hope this helps.
Steve
(Beefy Steve @ Jul. 30 2007,14:34)
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I can confirm though that all children are indeed posessed of Demons at various stages of their lives, girls in particular are seriously afflicted around the age of fourteen.
The cattle prod technique is of little use at this sad time, although the Demon seems to be able to be charmed into brief submission by copius offerings of money.
The cattle prod technique is of little use at this sad time, although the Demon seems to be able to be charmed into brief submission by copius offerings of money.
AMEN!
I think Bill Cosby put it better when he referred to all children as “brain damaged”. I have 3 grandchildren…I KNOW what I’m talking about. I have a son near 30 who is more damaged now than when he was 3. If only I’d had a cattleprod back then…
Actually, my brother and I were certified morons when we were children and should NEVER have been allowed to re-produce so I guess I brought it on myself…sigh…
Gentlemen, please don’t trivialise this topic.
And the “copious offerings of money” works well for females of any age.
Come to think about it, one woman I knew responded very well to the cattle prod strategy too! But that’s a whole different subject. 
Just for the record, my daughter when at the age of teenism was A DEMON IN DISGUISE!
Since she has two daughters of her own now and complains when they are little terrors I just smile that grandpa smile and say
Me "Paybacks are a bitch ain’t they"
My Daughter "But dad, I was a little angel when I was their age"
Me “Angel huh, yep you were, but, so was Satan before falling from grace!”
and don’t you hate it when your grown kids get to telling stories about the things they did that you had NO IDEA they did!
the only comfort I can take is when I think of the things I DID that my parents never had a clue either.
It just goes to show, history truly does repeat itself and there is nothing new under the sun…including music.
Oh? did I just bring it down again?
Nah mfl, you didn’t bring it down. My parents played music and I play music. The difference being they played cover songs (gospel), I do attempt to write my own, not saying anything wrong with what they did.
Not knowing some of the things your kids did is a good thing, if my parents knew half the crap I did they would have excuted me LOL.
Then there’s the things your kids thought you didn’t know, they tell it and you look at them and say, I knew about that one. That’s the ones that make me stop and wonder just how much my parents knew I was doing!
History goes round in circles.
Spambot - I won’t offer you personal advice unless you ask me for it but why are you living with this woman? Her children need serious medical help, not an exorcist.
BTW - the police did not murder this “exorcist” in the first place.
Only kids that have no initiative don’t need a cattle prod now an then, or would if their parents found out what they were doing. The truly scary ones are the “little angles”.
(sense of humor anyone?)
(mfl @ Jul. 30 2007,15:07)
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I think Bill Cosby put it better when he referred to all children as “brain damaged”. I have 3 grandchildren…I KNOW what I’m talking about. I have a son near 30 who is more damaged now than when he was 3. If only I’d had a cattleprod back then…
Actually, my brother and I were certified morons when we were children and should NEVER have been allowed to re-produce so I guess I brought it on myself…sigh…
Actually, my brother and I were certified morons when we were children and should NEVER have been allowed to re-produce so I guess I brought it on myself…sigh…
“It’s the brain damage…”
Hilarious.
“Kids - they’re such…children!”
Spam, let’s let the little 2 year old child hang with mine for a while, and they can entertain each other.
Tanning the hide out of a child doesn’t help - the father recognizes that, doesn’t he? It only raises the probability of a life of crime later…
You could tell him it’s his chance to work on his Karmic evolution, and achieve enlightment, realize his Buddha nature. Anyway, beating a 2 year old ought to be reported to the police. I mean, I know you are sort of kidding…but it’s a helluva thing to kid about…
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Tanning the hide out of a child doesn’t help
Of course it helps Tom!
Admittedly it may not help the child, but it certainly feels good to everyone else.
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Anyway, beating a 2 year old ought to be reported to the police.
It’s been tried Tom. Two hairy arsed coppers tried kicking the sh*t out of the “little angel”, but they had to admit defeat and gave up after 4 hours.
One of them (who seemed a really nice guy for a copper) had to enter counselling, but the prognosis is poor and it seems that he may never be a fully functional human being ever again.
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Spambot - I won’t offer you personal advice unless you ask me for it but why are you living with this woman? Her children need serious medical help, not an exorcist.
No, the woman is reasonably sane, it’s her son and daughter-in-law plus four grandchildren who need help.
Actually, it’s me who needs help. I had hoped that a psychopathic exorcist would be the solution, but your implied offer is even better.
So as I said, if you and Tom could please post your home addresses, I’ll log on to expedia and book 2 adult airplane seats and 4 boxes and ship them to you post haste.
Tom, we all love our kids, and our grandkids (although for grandchildren our love is best displayed for brief, relatively infrequent periods).
And it’s that love that stops us killing them.
Let’s be honest, 2 year olds, on the whole, are vile. They’ve learned the concept of “me”, but haven’t yet learned that other people’s “me” matters just as much.
But, we love them, so we grin and bear it, and hope that they emerge from that stage as decent human beings. But that’s just one of many stages of tribulation that we face as parents, and we do the best we can in every stage.
But, other people’s kids?
Cull them.
Keep the ones that show promise and send the rest to the sausage factory.
There’s no shortage of human beings on this planet, in fact, the presence of too many human beings means that this planet is facing an ecological disaster of major proportions.
Johnathan Swift advocated fattening Irish babies for English tables, but I think he set his sights too narrowly, and anyway, making them into sausages would be far better.
After all, we have no qualms about eating the young of our fellow living creatures, so why does our moral indignation suddenly flare up when it comes to our own species?
“We’re better than them”? “We have a soul” perhaps?
Come on Tom, I thought we’d moved beyond that.
I envisage vast baby farms; skilled baby drovers with their cattle prods driving herds of squalling brats from pasture to pasture; a welcome departure from our modern obscenity of factory farming, and a return to the days when mankind fitted in with his environment.
Remove the blinkers from your mind, share the dream!
(phoo @ Jul. 31 2007,09:41)
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Only kids that have no initiative don't need a cattle prod now an then, or would if their parents found out what they were doing. The truly scary ones are the "little angles".
(sense of humor anyone?)
(sense of humor anyone?)
Oh yes, the angles.